Postcard

I'm in Central Washington this week visiting family and enjoying the perfect weather, dry air, and gorgeous mountains. Here are some pics I took on the drive up:

I'll be back soon.

As you were.

Great Sesh!

I scheduled a lesson (#7) with another instructor yesterday since Jules was busy. Her name was Julie and I literally could have been her mother. Could have. Mothered her. I generally don't trust anyone under my age (currently 38), but Julie was great and I learned a lot of from her. Even if she did say, while chit-chatting, that she's about to start her final year of college and she feels soooo ooooold now.

Moving on.

I had an awesome time in the water. It was exactly what I needed. I'm heading up to Central Washington for a week tomorrow and really needed to get some good time in the water before going. It turned out to be pretty cool to be with a different instructor just to get another person's perspective and experience a different style. I mean, she's no Jules, but who is? Julie talked with me about tides and waves and the specifics of that beach. She was friendly and fun and generous, and I felt confident with her.

The conditions yesterday were sooooo different than they've been. I felt like I was with children who were monsters for me but behaved perfectly for the sitter. The waves were in actual lines coming in to the shore, and they were spaced perfectly twelve seconds apart. They were a little big for me - I asked Julie, "Four feet?" She said, "No, way bigger." But there was basically no undertow or riptide. This was not the ocean that bitch-slapped me two weeks ago or made me leave with my tail between my legs the day prior.

I talked with Julie about those two rough days and expected her to scold me for going out when I shouldn't have. I was so embarrassed for not being able to handle myself. She surprised me by saying that it was really good I went out those days because I'm going to need to experience all kinds of waves and all kinds of conditions as I surf. That's how I'll learn. And it was really good that I came in when I was tired and knew I couldn't match the water. That made me feel great. It's an awesome feeling to have someone absolve you of shame.

Julie had me choose all my waves or tell her why I wouldn't choose them. That was time-consuming but good. I feel much more confident with that now. She also changed my pop-up move a little, which was kind of frustrating but I'm open to trying anything. I took several waves and did my new left knee/right foot thing, which was fun. Julie said she feels that I'm so close to standing up. She said the next step will be to extend my left leg (I'm goofy) and pivot my hips to the left, so she had me try and I did it twice!

My frustration/embarrassment over not being able to surf solidly on my feet yet is well documented, and I still feel that, but I will say that I can feel myself improving. I do. It feels like a miracle wrapped in a rainbow painted with glitter dripping golden Skittles. There was a chunk of lessons with Jules where I just felt so hopeless. I imagined her smiling and saying goodbye after our lessons and going back to her car to sit and slam her head against her steering wheel. But I can see it - slower than any surfer in history, but it's happening. I'm learning, I'm improving, I'm getting better. And I'm having a complete blast.

About half-way through the session I hopped on my board to take another ride and Julie commented, half to herself, "Man, you are like a feather on that thing." A feather? I am like a feather? Did she just say I was like a feather? Maybe she meant elephant. I forget how she explained it because I kept thinking "OMG I'm a feather! Julie said I was a feather!" but it was something along the lines of being graceful and really hopping up and landing gently in just the right position on my board. Shall we all take a moment to remember how I couldn't lay on my board without flipping over just a mere two months ago? Or how I would hop up to get on it and slide right off the other side? And now I am a feather.

I did notice a definite decline in my endurance yesterday. Since my bad session I've been pouting and haven't run or worked out in any way for two weeks. Take that, ocean! I've had a steady diet of Captain Crunch cereal and root beer ice cream (not together) and I've decided that fitness can just go to hell. Well, let me tell you, that's no way to treat a body you want to float on a board. I guess the little bit of running I was doing was really helping me in the water. Who knew. Exercise improves your health. You heard it here first.

So I had an awesome, awesome day. On one hand, I was bummed to want an instructor with me after having three solo days. I'm pretty much out of money and it's so much cheaper to go alone (especially with my Bro Deal :>). But I need some time with an instructor to get me in the water and rebuild my confidence after my mishap. I can't tell you how pumped I am from yesterday. I can't wait to get back at it and show Jules what I've learned since our last lesson. And to show her that I'm a feather.

Win!

How totally stoked was I to get back after a great morning surfing (yay! more on that soon) and find an e-mail from Patagonia that I'd won a giveaway from their blog, The Cleanest Line? Very stoked! I was even wearing my favorite Patagonia t-shirt today from their store in Haleiwa, Hawaii, which I love, love, love. (Seen here. I wear it a lot. Their t-shirts are seriously the softest, thickest, yummiest shirts you'll find.)

Now, I've long said that I have fantastic luck, and I don't play the lottery because it simply wouldn't be fair to everyone else. But it's been a while since I've won anything, so this is pretty fun.

The giveaway was for the book Chasing Waves: A Surfer's Tale of Obsessive Wandering by Amy Waeschle. Amazon has it here, but guess what? I won it and it's on its way to my house right now! I can't wait to start reading. I'll let you guys know what I think, but I have a feeling I'm going to love it.

Solo Day #3

This is unfortunately LSL Migraine Edition™, so I'm going to whisper tonight. If you can't hear, just scoot a little closer.

I had a disappointing day surfing today. And by disappointing, of course I mean better than any day I've ever had working. It was my first time back in the water after being attacked by my surfboard. I was very proud of myself for getting back in the saddle, especially without Jules by my side. (Jules has a life outside of being my Zen master and is busy all this week. The nerve.) Everything was going fine until I actually got in the water and then I freaked. The conditions were pretty good, not as crazy as that one day, but the currents were still stronger than I'm used to. And while I could control my board better, I just didn't feel ok about it. My heart was pounding like right after running that 5k. I was freaked.

I only took about 5 or 6 waves before getting out and letting my fear get the best of me. (And then I berated myself all day for driving that far for only 5 or 6 waves.) But the good news is that two of the rides were great, and one in particular was my best ride so far. Twice I rode strong waves the entire way in on my left knee AND RIGHT FOOT! My foot! It was in contact with the board! For an entire ride! My back was straight and the board was steady (although weaving gently back and forth - very cool feeling) and I couldn't even believe what was happening. It felt so stable and different and good. Sweet, sweet progress.

So I scheduled a lesson for tomorrow (I'm cheating on Jules, god help me) to help get my confidence in the water back and give me more practice time. I'm excited.

On the drive home I got my first ever migraine (wow) and made the very rare move of speeding because I was worried about how quickly the migraine would progress and I didn't know what that would be like. And that's when I got pulled over and got a speeding ticket. I know. So frustrating. I didn't explain about the headache or anything - I hate excuses - and I did cry, but only after he left. I haven't had a ticket for over ten years, (wait, there was one in Japan), but I've never been pulled over and gotten off with just a warning. I always get the ticket. Sucks. So frustrating when my funds are so limited. But I was speeding. Tomorrow will be better, right?

Also, unrelated but must include: This story made my day. It might make yours, too.

We Can Quote The Bible, Too

Via Joe My God, I think, although I can't find the link. Love it.

Memory Lane

I've been starting to feel some stress about finding a job and some other things, so I decided a good OCD-inspired project would help soothe my over-active mind. I bought a scanner yesterday and except for a brief sleep, I've been sitting in my pajamas at the dining room table going through photos ever since.

All of my photos are already labeled, in date order, in boxes separated by year. (I can't help it.) So I've been going through them and starting at the beginning and just scanning, keeping them in date order and filing them by year on my Mac. I back up my Mac regularly (daily or weekly) via Mac's awesome Time Machine technology (which I had to use last night for the first time ever - it was amazing and it saved my bacon), and then I have a separate external hard drive which I use to back up my pictures and documents a second time. (A Western Digital My Passport 250 gig. It's tiny and awesome.) I do that every week or so.

But now I have a few dilemmas. First, do I throw away my hard copy pics once I scan them? I am very anti-clutter, but it's pretty counter-intuitive to throw out pictures. Second, even though I have two back-ups of my photos, it worries me to have everything on-site. I wish I could also do an off-site back up, but the reviews for Carbonite and similar services are terrible. Should I just put my 2nd hard drive in a different place in my house?

Anyone? What have you done? What would you do if you had OCD and time on your hands? Be nice or the kitten gets it.

Cross Another One Off The Life List

Three months ago I started walking around my neighborhood at night. It's such a nice area and I was grateful to be back in Portland and wanted to get some fresh air. I went to Portland Running Company (what champs) to get a new pair of walking shoes and the awesome person there gave me a pair just right for my feet, and mentioned they were also running shoes just in case I wanted to use them for that, too. I told her I didn't. No running, just walking.

After a few weeks I decided to try the local high school track to see how far I could run. Just for fun. I could run 1/4 of a mile without stopping. I started doing that a few times a week and eventually was able to increase it.

I accomplished something really big this weekend. My brother and I ran the 5k Bank to Bay race in Tacoma, WA. My only goal was to run the entire way and not have to walk at all, and I did it. I finished 41st out of 53 in my age group :>. My amazing brother, who I call my twin (I'm 8 years older), ran with me the entire way and gave me lots of encouragement, especially during a mother of a hill on that last mile. We had fun doing it together.

I'm disappointed to say that I've struggled with my internal dialogue quite a bit since. Ridiculous, I know. I didn't run it fast enough, hard enough, good enough. I haven't lost an ounce during all that running, so what's the point? It's so hard to show up for yourself! So I'm trying to just be proud of my accomplishment. And build on it going forward.

Solo Day #2

I blew off everything and went surfing alone again on Friday. I'm still amazed there was even a solo day #1, much less 2 . . . am I dreaming? I'd actually been hoping to be able to surf on September 11th, so it was nice to have the weather to do it. It was record-breaking temps here in Portland, and it turned out to be just as beautiful at the coast.

When I rented my gear I talked with the shop owner and went with my regular soft-top this time. I told him I'm just not ready for another learning curve. (I need some progress on my current board first!) The girl charged me full price for everything and the dude told her - "Hey, LSL's becoming a regular. We give her a discount. We're about to write her name on a wetsuit in the back." Yay, bro deal! (Wo deal? I'm going to have to think about this.) Before I left he warned me to be careful. "It's supposed to get big out there later."

When Jules and I go out together, part of our beach talk is checking 3 things: the swell size, the tide and the wind. Those two days of surfing alone, I did the same survey of conditions before going in, but I'm still learning what the conditions mean. The swell was just over 5' and the wind was moderate. The waves were pretty close together - just maybe 4 seconds, which isn't ideal. And I noticed immediately that the few surfers that were out all seemed pretty experienced and all were quite shallow. There wasn't one person who'd paddled out. That's rare - usually the experienced kids are way out of the cove where I can barely see them through the waves.

So when I got in the water (I love those first few steps in the water) I immediately felt uneasy about the conditions. It was chaos. The waves weren't lapping up on the beach - they were washing in and then churning backwards almost violently. There was a strong undercurrent - when I wiped out, I got carried out very quickly, and I actually got a charlie horse in my calf that stayed for days from trying to dig my feet in the sand to stop myself from moving. There was also something funky going on where I was in knee-deep water one minute and chest-deep the next (without moving.) The waves were incredibly strong and too close together. When I would take one, it was like being shot out of a cannon, and I also noticed I wasn't riding on top of the water - half the wave was coming over me as well. Total suck. Later that night I wondered if I was surfing in a riptide, but I moved around to a few spots and the whole damn ocean felt like a riptide. At the time I was more confused than scared. I took about three rides and then just got out of the water. I wanted so badly to ask other surfers what the hell was going on, but I didn't have the courage.

I sat on the beach for about 45 minutes and used the time to meditate about September 11th and those directly affected. I was glad to be outside with Mama Earth that day, and figured the conditions would be back to normal when I got back in the water.

Yeah, they weren't. There was one point after a wipeout where I was carried out very quickly and there was nothing I could do about it. I couldn't stand up. I panicked for just a minute and then forced myself to relax knowing it wouldn't help to freak. There were two experienced surfers very close to me and I'd hoped they were aware of me. I told myself I'd stop surfing if they went in. But the whole thing sucked. I took one great, great ride - only on my knees, but it still felt great. It was the most powerful wave I've surfed, and I was on both knees with a totally straight back looking around and going very fast. I rode it the entire way in and then sat back down on the board. Other than that, every wave was a wipeout and every wipeout was a confusing mess of being held underwater and feeling disoriented when I could finally get back up.

So the story goes that I got tired and disoriented and in the worst position possible - standing up with my board between me and the wave - and I took the board to my head quite hard. I hate thinking about it. There were two strong waves coming at me one second apart, and right before they hit, I realized my mistake. I said quietly, "Oh no" and then got smacked in the head with my board. I didn't have the presence of mind to protect my head with my arms until I hit the water, but the board was already long gone by then, leash pulling at my ankle.

The wave knocked me down and held me under and by the time I was able to come up, I was done. The board hit hard and I started hurting right away. I thought it hit the side of my head, but the black eye that I almost immediately got tells me it hit my face as well. I grabbed the board and walked out of the water and up to my car. I was completely freaked out.

Angry, angry water that day. *Shudder.* By the time I left the waves were well over 7'. The surf report said they were 9' and later grew to 12'. I would have loved to have Jules with me to explain wtf was going on. I still feel a little freaked out. The whole thing happened in one second, but it felt like slow motion, and I've replayed it over and over in my mind. Pause on the part where the board is coming at me.

It's such a vulnerable place to be; I have all my armor off out there. It's by design - you can't get in the ocean without admitting that you're at it's mercy. (But you can be a lot smarter than I was and not surf in conditions you don't recognize.) So I got a good reminder on Friday. And I got a shiner like a diamond. I'm going to learn what I can from the experience and keep on surfing. I'll go out again by myself, and I'll keep taking lessons with Jules to help my confidence.

(At this point I would like to say that in my life leading up to this point, the biggest injury I have risked is probably a paper cut.)

Upside: Now I can use that "You should see the other guy" joke.

Solo Day

I had the ultimate funemployment moment today: I woke up a little late, thought about everything I had to do, and decided to blow it all off to go surfing. I'm not sure how long I'll be in the position to do that, so I really enjoyed it.

This was my first time out (besides Hawaii) without Jules. It was an important barrier to cross because I've kind of been afraid of going out without her - not so much because of the waves or sharks or anything (although I did dream of shark attacks last night and kept one eyeball peeled for them all day), but more because of the lack of confidence factor. If I'm with an instructor, it's natural that I wouldn't know what I'm doing. If I flail and wipe out alone, I'm just a dork. Jules also kind of helps me assert my place in the water. I'm so afraid of angering experienced surfers that I kind of shift all day long to stay out of their way. I always want to be aware of other folks and show proper respect, but I do this probably more than I really need to.

So I just did it - checked the surf reports, drove to the beach and rented gear. The shop owner suggested I use a different board this time. I was skeptical and should have been a little more forthright about what I needed, but I took his advice and used a 10' fiberglass board (although I swear that thing was 9'!) With Jules I'm still using a soft-top, foam-core board, so this was a big difference. It ended up being mostly frustrating, and next time I'll just stick with that I know. I did enjoy experiencing something new, and of course the feel of a fiberglass board is much nicer, but I had the learning curve of just balancing on my belly again, never mind the waves. I never felt fully stable to the point I was able to concentrate on paddling and taking the wave. It was a mostly frustrating day. I only caught 15 or so rides and didn't get on both feet even once. But I was grateful to be in the water, and it was better than my best day working.

The weather and surf conditions were pretty much the best I've ever seen at the coast. Crazy. Gorgeous. 4' waves that grew to well over 6' by the time I left, maybe 10 seconds in between, basically no wind. Beautiful. Also, not a cloud in the sky and about 75°. Really nice day.

I missed Jules. She's not just my sensei, she's my Zen master, right? I definitely prefer surfing with her. Today I learned a lot about picking my waves, which is important. When I'm with Jules she says, "This one's yours" which I appreciate, as it allows me to not have to focus on everything just yet. But today I watched the waves break and peel and it was good for me to see how different waves feel.

When I was renting my gear, the owner dude gave me some wax (Stay Covered, cold for 58° and below) to use on the board, and that was kind of fun. (It's the little things.) I read a book about surfing for girls and in it the authors complained that guys usually get freebies from stores and girls don't. They called it the "Bro Deal." Last week the shop gave me a big discount off a couple of t-shirts I purchased, and today I get the free wax. Go me. Plus, I love the smell of this wax. (Which is good because it's stuck in my hair. That stuff gets everywhere.)

Today in the water I thought a lot about my process and my (sorry, I can't think of any other word but) journey. I notice that I'm frustrated with my progress lately, certain anyone else would be much further along, and I start to feel that I'm either hopeless, or that the time I spend in the water is specifically about some future skill level I hope to have. I surf now to be better later. I think it's fine to want to improve and I certainly hope that I can learn to ride consistently on my feet (!), but I want to appreciate what I have and what I can do right now. I'm in the water because I love it and because it's fun. It makes me feel closer to nature and closer to myself. I love taking a belly ride and feeling the energy change beneath me when the wave picks me up. And I love charging forward with my left knee and trying to get my right foot in place, even though it doesn't really work that well. I love smashing into the water when I've really pushed myself to pop, even if it doesn't end like I want it to. So I'm working on appreciating the now in the water. It feels good.

Feeling This

The Blink-182 concert was tonight, and while it may not be your cup of tea, it was my own little punk dream come true. It was a great show, and hopefully Tom will get substance abuse help at some point. He spent the whole time insulting the audience, and probably the cleanest thing he said the entire concert was when he introduced the band: "Mark is a Pisces. He likes long walks on the beach and a tiny bit of Vicks Vapor Rub under his balls."

I started listening to Blink kind of late, in about 2000 during my MBA program. I was going through a lot of changes - going back to school, ending a major relationship, buying my first house - and Blink music expressed things that I was unable to. When I moved to Japan I had three Blink albums on constant rotation. Their last CD was probably the last CD I ever purchased, as I was finally getting set up on iTunes then. I listened to it incessantly on the 4 1/2 hour drive between my two offices.

Music can transport you, of course, and tonight I had such strong Japan memories that I'm surprised I drove on the correct side of the road on the way home. I was carried away to Fukuoka, the half-way point on my drive where I would stop and get CoCo's curry and other treats. I can smell Fukuoka - the canals and the hot chocolate I used to sip while sitting on the river bank. I can instantly feel my confused, tangled heart loving Japan, loving Fukuoka, and at the same time feeling isolated and lonely. Lonely for friends and family who spoke my language, lonely for a regular-sized washing machine, lonely for Mexican food. For me, Blink's music is all about the intense pleasure/pain and confusion of growing up. It fit perfectly with my Japan experience.

Tonight the show could have been called The Travis Barker Show - I don't know anything about drums, but he was great. I could have watched him all day. I love Mark's sold, rich voice - there's something about it that makes me feel grounded and understood. And I appreciated Tom's non sequiturs, even when he screamed "I'm gonna go down on Oprah!" in the middle of a song. Great, great night.

Aaaaaand . . . confetti.

Eat It

• I'm starting to have anxiety a little more often about what I'm going to do for work and when I'm going to do it.
• eHarmony guy #2 was super nice and pretty interesting, but a no-go. Guy #3 is on deck. (Calling me to chat but hasn't asked me out yet.) A friend suggested that it might take meeting 100 guys before clicking with one. Really? Because I am totally not interested in doing this that long.
• I went to an Eric Hutchinson show on Sunday night where he won me over (again) with his smooth tunes and witty humor. The crowd was nuts for him. I almost didn't go because it started at 10:00 PM (PM!) but I'm so glad I did. Eric playing one of my faves here.
• I saw my dentist last week after a three-year absence (because of living in NY, not because I have poor dental hygiene) and she said, "Oh my god, are you aging backwards?!" The hygienist made a similar comment when I saw her. They said I look the youngest I ever have. This has more to do with how horrible I looked and how unhappy I was the last time I saw them (on leave from Japan), and how I haven't lost my Hawaii tan yet due to my unemployedtastic status, but it was nice to hear. Plus no cavities.
• Last night I dreamt I had prison sex with Maria Mena. Plus we were flying above Europe without a plane. No more pizza before bed.
• I've been away from yoga for two weeks due to volunteering and other commitments. I'm back starting today and my goal is to do all three beginner classes per week for the next couple of weeks, at least. No one is more surprised than I am to say it has totally helped with stress, tight muscles, balance, breathing, everything. Crazy.
• Oh man, I love this (not for the faint of heart.) Christians, the Apocolypse wants you to lose it's number. Srsly. (Via JMG.)
• I thought I might try to write up a couple of my travel experiences and submit them to travel mags or websites. Just for fun.
• Two more sleeps until the Blink-182 concert!
• Jules is away for two weeks so my challenge is to overcome the fear of surfing without her. We'll see.
• Favorite Twitterer ever: @shhdonttellsteve.
• This scared the crap out of me:

Surf Lesson #6

I wanted to write a little about my most recent surf lesson so I don't forget all the yummy goodness. I'll back-date it to keep everything in order (they don't call it OCD for nothing), but I want to make sure it have it on the record.

I mean, I don't know how else to break it to you except to just say it: It was the perfect day.

The highlight of the lesson actually happened before I even made it to the beach. As I turned the corner on my way up to the spot, a guy with a board on top of his car passed me. I was talking on the phone giving my mom some reminders on how to sync her iPod (you guys, my mom totally has an iPod Touch. Isn't she cool?), and as I passed this guy he gives me the big thumbs down out his window. I was at once intrigued and perplexed. When I reached the beach I asked Jules, "Was he mad at me for talking on my cell phone, or was he trying to tell me that the waves suck?" She smiled and said, "He was giving you the surf report."

Wow! Crazy. This guy and I totally shared a bond. We had communicated without words. I was in his club or something. I still don't know exactly why it made me so happy, but it was super awesome.

Other highlights from the day:

• I took three belly rides before Jules said, "Hey, what do you want to do today?" which I think meant, "Are we even trying anymore?" After that, on every ride I made an effort to get on my feet. That meant really pushing myself, and pushing through fears of pearling again. I never really did it for more than three seconds, and never in a position where I could truly balance upright, but I tried to get there on every single ride. And on just about every ride I had two feet (or some version thereof) on the deck. That's great for me.
• We saw a sea lion! Gosh! The marine life just keeps getting bigger. (Uh ho.) This was crazy. Jules saw him for a while but I couldn't find him. Suddenly I see a big hairy nose pop out of the water! I asked Jules if he was friend or foe, but she said he's just another surfer. (With the caveat, "I wouldn't try to pet him . . . ") I don't know why, maybe because he looked like he donned a wetsuit this morning just to get out in the water, too, but it was an awesome feeling to be hanging with this guy. He messed around in really shallow water for quite some time. We just looked at him from a distance.
• It was sunny out, but really windy. The waves were total mush, and that was new for me. I learned that mushy waves are unpredictable and difficult to ride - they come on with some power and then, mid-ride, they're completely gone. Or they switch directions. Or they just kind of churn. Real surfers hate them, but guess what? I'll surf anything. I don't care if they're mushy. I am so grateful to have anything, I'll surf the hell out of those waves. I think this is one of the benefits of being a complete rookie.
• After my lesson Jules left and I stayed again to take some more waves. I spent about 45 minutes trying to do my thing, and then I ran out of energy and took my board up on the beach. Usually at that point I return to my car, return my gear and head home, but I couldn't bring myself to do it. I missed the water the second my foot stepped on dry sand. I ended up going back in for about 45 minutes without my board, just me in my wetsuit swimming around and smiling from ear to ear. I'm telling you, I was in love.
• Before leaving for the day, I stood in the water and watched a more experienced surfer who was in the water way out there. Maybe he was good but not great, or maybe he was just practicing, but he didn't ride any waves in. He was getting up and then making sharp turns right and left, and then wiping out, all way out there in the water, over and over. He looked amazing. Because of the bright sun I could only see his silhouette, and he seemed to be part-ballet dancer, part-dolphin. I was mesmerized. I spent at least 20 minutes just watching his moves. All I can think to describe it is that he was making a carving or slicing motion on top of the waves. It was gorgeous.

So another great, great lesson. So enjoyable. I returned my gear and then, for the first time, stayed in town. The weather was too perfect to leave. I got a couple liters of water, a sandwich and a new book from the bookshop, and went to a bench on the beach. I read for about a half-hour, and then I laid on the bench with my eyes closed, baking in the sun, thinking about how great I felt for another hour. It was the perfect day.

Happy Birthday, Sister

My big sister turns 40 today. I'm not sure how that's possible, because if she's 40 that means I'll be 40 in 18 months. She's my best friend and I love her very much. She is strong, giving, and funny. She has great fashion sense, knows when to be direct, and gives a mean hep B shot.

We used to color rocks together and sell them on the curb in front of our house. We would pack small bags and run away together to our grandparent's house around the corner. We survived years of matching outfits. We walked to school together, being mistaken for twins until I shot past her in height. She has been there for me through Camp Fire, CCD, K-Tel records, and Solid Gold dancers. We went through the mandatory 1979 Rick Springfield phase together. (That might not have ended yet.) After she graduated and moved out, she would knock on my bedroom window to signal a late-night Denny's run. She helped drop me off for college and gave me the only $20 I had to my name. She celebrated my 30th birthday with me by riding trains through Italy.

Living up the street from her in New York for the past three years was a gift, and I miss that all the time. We've come a long way from the slap fights we used to have while doing the dishes after dinner. She's blazed a trail for me in lots of ways and I will always look up to her.