Tuesday, February 17, 2009

My Sunny Someday

Two weeks ago today I was getting my ass handed to me on a platter. I can't believe it's already been two weeks. I am up to my neck in details about the move, and I am getting over it. I am over it. I have lists and spreadsheets with check marks by each line. I've set times to disconnect my utilities here and connect them there. I've put everything in boxes or plastic tubs. I've lined up the tubs in the storage room so they'll be easy for the idiots to grab when they're loading the truck. I've argued with the auto shipment place. I've talked with my contact at the moving company 500 times - we're completely sick of each other. I've gone over and over my finances. I've sorted items that need to be sent to Portland ahead of my move so I won't have to wait; I've made a list of items that definitely need to be on my person when I arrive. I have a list of things I need to do the first day in Portland (1. Buy litter box.) I've cleaned out the car. I've cleaned out the garage. I don't know what else to do.  

At night I lay in bed and think about being laid off. I think about the week or two before, when my bosses knew they'd be laying me off, and I think about how they interacted with me and how one boss was so unusually nice and chatty that I mentioned it to a friend. I know none of it matters, but my mind just goes in that direction and I go over and over it in my mind. It's like massaging a bruise or something; my mind is just drawn there. 


  1. My mind would do that too. Hang in there. Soon you'll be in Portland and full of possibility!

  2. We'll be more than happy to have you right here where you belong!

  3. A Lewis, I'm glad my sis has someone for her in Portland...although we do wish she was coming here to Seattle.


  4. Man oh man! I have to admit that I hadn't been by the site in the last few days ...this whole move was a shock for me.

    I am SO excited for you though. It's strange how excited I am for you. I feel like it's perfect. It's meant to be. It's really the oddest feeling, honestly. I just read that you are going to Portland and thought immediately: You are going to be so happy.

    I don't know where that comes from... but I believe it. Good luck!

  5. It's natural to be stunned by the shock of what happened, but I'm sure you're doing the right thing in moving. A fresh environment will focus you outward on your future whereas staying put would have had you dwelling on old stuff. You have the comfort (?) of knowing that what happened at your company didn't occur in isolation, but is happening all over the States and around the world, so it's nothing personal. If anything, it's given you a chance to rethink what you want to do - and you were leaning that way anyway. Good luck with your move. I want to see pictures of lovely Portland soon!

  6. i think yours is a pretty normal reaction. i can't imagine being in the bosses shoes either though, knowing that you had to lay some people off. that would be awful. do you tell them ahead of time? do you keep it a secret? there are so many problems with either decision.

    at any rate, it's normal to feel personally slighted and angry, but i am very, very heartened to hear that you are getting over it.

    i know that portland is going to treat you right.

  7. Wow! Big changes. Every time I pack my entire life up into two suitcases and a couple of boxes, I say I'll never do it again, but then life happens...

    May your move be as hassle free as is possible!

  8. Although I am saddened by your lay off and by all the stress of your move I am soooo excited you are moving back to the PNW. A friend of mine from Goodreads just moved there, another one is thinking about it and you are gonna be there now too !!!! Of course what makes me COMPLETELY AND INSANELY JEALOUS is that you will be there before Patrick and I..... Oh well I will deal. Once we get there we will have to connect for a drink or a coffee or a something !

  9. Lots going on in your world! Sorry for the layoff. Seems to be very common these days. Sad to see you leave upstate NY but given the circumstances, I would choose Portland over it. Best of luck with it all. Hang in there. And keep us updated on your next exciting chapter!